In my case, the problem never was that I couldn’t get to sleep or that I couldn’t get enough sleep, but that my body forced me to sleep at the wrong time of day, and then wouldn’t let me sleep when the right time rolled around. I call it “Sedentary Jetlag,” but I’m sure there’s a much cleverer medical term for it that ends in “syndrome.” It manifested back in 2002, when I was getting sick with Hashimoto’s and not knowing it. I would fall asleep every evening, some time around 7-9:00, and sleep until the middle of the night, waking up about 1-3:00 in the morning, and staying awake for several hours until 4-6:00. Then I could finally get back to sleep after the sun would rise.

This was really problematic for a lot of reasons. I was always tired and always fighting with myself to try to sleep at the right times for sleeping and to be awake at the right times for doing things. More than any other symptom – weight gain, sweating, acne – the sleep problems ruined my social life. It’s hard to ask a girl out for, let’s say, dinner and a movie if there’s a very low chance you’ll be able to stay awake for the movie.

Sure, sometimes I really could force myself to stay awake until midnight. But I couldn’t do it two nights in a row. That was impossible for me. I followed all the sleep hygiene advice, far more than what’s in the article above. I did stuff like wearing socks until right before bedtime, then taking them off. I never used my bed for anything except sleeping. Etc, etc. I also tried sleeping pills, but they just knocked me out and then I woke up feeling like I had missed a whole night’s sleep.

This all lasted for seven years, including five after being diagnosed with Hashimoto’s and no one being able to tell me anything useful. I kept pestering my endocrinologist and he eventually sent me to a sleep lab. They diagnosed me with sleep apnea and sent me home with a CPAP, but the whole thing was actually an elaborate scheme to try to sell the CPAP to me for a huge markup. Truthfully, I wanted it to work, but it didn’t help a bit, and actually I had a much harder time sleeping with it than without it. Eventually a doctor I saw privately looked over the sleep lab’s documentation and told me that my “sleep apnea” was so mild that it easily fell within the normal range for someone my age, and probably even close to optimal.

Finally I decided to try using melatonin. My idea was that I could take it to regulate my sleep schedule, forcing myself to sleep at the correct times so that I would be refreshed in the mornings and wouldn’t need the extra sleep in the evenings. I couldn’t get the melatonin here, so I waited for a visit to the United States last February. Amazingly, it worked – and it’s just as simple as that. I flew to see my family and arrived there in the morning, forced myself to stay awake until about 10 at night, took a melatonin pill that I’d bought that day at CVS, and slept well. Then I was able to stay awake the following evening until 11:00, the night after that until 12:00, and from then on, I can stay awake until whenever I need (within reason), just making sure to use the melatonin a couple hours before bedtime, and also turning off the lights and avoiding the computer and television screens.

I can warmly endorse melatonin for people who’ve had problems like mine and who’ve tried everything else. But I am still bothered that it is not a solution to my problems, only a treatment. I do worry about its long-term effects and am not mollified by assurances that it’s harmless because the body produces it.

I hope one day to find a doctor who will honestly and expertly address the root cause of my trouble with sleep, so I can deal with it correctly.

This sounds awfully familiar to me. Growing up it was always “stress” that was causing me severe indigestion and discomfort. Whether it was constipation or diarrhea, bloating, gas, cramps, aches or anything else, my mother and the pediatrician always said “stress.” How many times when I was 10 fucking years old could I explain to them that I was not “stressed” and I had nothing to be stressed about?

Years later an actual doctor gave me an actual diagnosis of an actual disease – Hashimoto’s Thyroiditis. She might have been the only doctor who ever believed me that “stress” was not my problem. Now whenever I go to the endocrinologist or the family physician on my HMO and try to tell them that I am treating my Hashimoto’s and still experiencing crappy quality of life symptoms (fatigue, tiredness in the evening, sweating, weight gain), I’m back to hearing about “stress.”

1. The girls in my city are wearing almost no clothing. And I don’t just mean on the beach, which I try to visit at least once a week. I mean everywhere – walking on the street, sitting in the park, eating in restaurants, shopping in the mall, riding on buses and trains – they’re barely covered – all ages – and it’s wonderful.
2. I am sweating like a pig. Actually, how does the expression go? Horses sweat, men perspire and women glow? No, I don’t “perspire,” I sweat like it’s nobody’s business. I sweat like there’s no tomorrow, like my body temperature is 200 degrees or something.

In the winter, I sweat like a normal person should sweat in the summer, and in the summer I sweat like no person should ever sweat. I walk outside the house and within minutes my face is all wet and I’m dripping sweat everywhere. People think I’ve just run a marathon and they’re always offering me glasses of water. Thanks, but I already drink plenty of water. So I try to go outside mainly at night, when it’s a little cooler and when there are fewer people around to stare at me. This doesn’t help much, but at least no yet has recently approached me and asked if I’m all right and if I need a place to sit down.